In the end, that’s the only conclusion we can draw. There are people out there who are pretty afraid of sex (more specifically sexuality and sexual attraction). Anything that makes them or others feel seems to bring out bile and anger. The almost literally deny reality in their obsession.
In short since they can’t imagine sexual attraction without feeling fear or hatred, they assume anyone else who feels it is either a victim or a rapist.
They don’t see it like that of course. They are sure they like sex and want sexual relationships – they just manage to define both of those in such an obtuse way that they won’t ever have to actually deal with it. Often people like this will invoke the patron saint of insane sexual paranoia – Andrea Dworkin (more about Andrea in another post).
“There are many reasons for this, but the crux of the matter is that I agreed wholeheartedly with Andrea Dworkin when she said that porn destroys women.” – Debs invoking saint Dworkin
Debs is not nearly so badly afflicted as a number of other “radical feminists” on the web so at first I had hoped that a comment so obviously silly was perhaps an exaggeration for literary effect or blog hits. Sadly Debs seems to actually believe this stuff.
“People say that getting rid of porn would be censorship. Well, true, but it’s a censorship I’m more than willing to put up with if it means that women are liberated from the constant role of sex-thing, always available, always ready, never allowed to think.” – Debs invoking saint Dworkin
See what I mean? Since it is a clear reality to the sane that many women actually do manage to think and engage in activities other than fuck doll the real question is through what lens of obsession is Debs looking?
The anger and fear in Debs post says much more about her (and those who feel like she does) than it says about us. Everywhere Debs looks she sees something that makes her think about women in the submissive role. Every sexually charged image drives her to a feeling of fear. All around her she can see humans interacting in ways she simply cannot understand and she seeks an answer to this.
For Debs and a number of others who share her issues the answer is clear – the world is run by a conspiracy of sadists and populated by women who are too stupid, too indoctrinated or two weak to resist. Anyone who denies that they feel as Debs and the others feel is a victim or an enemy.
“So, whenever I hear someone refer to themselves as a “pro-porn feminist”, I just mentally knock the feminist bit off the end, because anybody who is in any way willing to support a multi-billion pound industry that does actually destroy women, cannot in my mind make any claim to caring about women’s rights.” – Debs defining what is and isn’t feminist
What is Debs really afraid of though? I don’t think it’s rape. I think is inadequacy. Debs (despite having kids and thus, probably, having sex) makes the same point others do – that in the end pornography makes them feel unattractive or incapable of measuring up for their current, past or future partner*. They feel in her own that men find them useless if they don’t comply – and since they clearly do not comply in their minds they clearly feel this punishment is imminent.
“shuts women up, keeps them in “˜their place’, lets them know their role in society, lets them know what men want and expect of them, lets them know if they do not comply with the rules of pornography they will be disregarded as useless to men, and thus useless to society (because the society is run by men.)” – Debs shows us her nightmare
To be fair Debs goes out of her way to express her support for sex. She wants to make it perfectly clear to us that she is not “anti sex” – she just doesn’t think most of us should look at pictures of it. She doesn’t say it in this post you can be sure she is also no fan of BDSM or many other “kinks” and that she has a checklist the size of Texas to go through before blessing sex as allowable.
Those of us who don’t agree are, as always, the enemy and evil tools of the patriarchy. Which is actually a relief since I was starting to think we were reptilian aliens hiding among humans to further the interests of the NWO and big oil**.
* note: lesbian “radical feminists” often have the same fears about either lesbian or heterosexual pornography. They will often express the fear that they will be found lacking or unattractive compared to the women in porn regardless of orientation.
** Note 2: A post about someone with sex and porn issues would be an obvious place for a “Roswell Rods” joke, but that’s for another post.
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